Robert Lone
Licensed Psychologist
23 years of experience licensed in Washington, California, and additional states. Robert has dedicated his career to helping older adults live with more confidence and clarity.
Read full bioFor Caregivers and Families
How to Talk to Your Parent About Therapy
By Total Life · July 7, 2026
Many older adults are open to therapy once they understand what it is and that Medicare covers it. The conversation is easier than you think.
Why older adults resist therapy, and why that is changing
For many people who grew up in the mid-20th century, mental health care carried a heavy stigma. Talking to a therapist was seen as something for people with serious problems, a sign of weakness, or simply something the family kept private. Your parent may not say any of this out loud, but it often shapes their first instinct to decline.
That is changing. Awareness of mental health has grown significantly, and older adults are increasingly open to support, particularly when it is framed around everyday wellbeing rather than diagnosis. Calling it "talking to someone," a "mental health check-in," or even a "wellness conversation" can lower the initial resistance. The goal is not to convince your parent they have a problem. It is to open a door.
How to start the conversation
1
Lead with a specific observation, not a general concern
There is a big difference between "You seem depressed" and "You seem like you have had a hard time since Mom passed." The second one is specific, observational, and much easier to receive. It shows you have been paying attention without labeling or diagnosing.
2
Mention that Medicare covers it
Cost is often the biggest unstated barrier. Many older adults assume therapy is expensive or a luxury. Knowing that Medicare covers most or all of the cost changes the conversation immediately. Lead with: "And the good news is it is covered by Medicare, so it would not cost anything."
3
Offer to help with the first step
Asking your parent to figure out how to find a therapist on their own can feel overwhelming. Offer to handle the logistics: "I can look into it for you and set it up. All you have to do is make the call." Removing the friction makes it much easier to say yes.
4
Give it time
You may need to plant the seed and revisit the conversation a few weeks later. That is normal. A first "no" often becomes a "well, maybe" once the idea has had time to settle. Do not push. Just make clear you are there to help when they are ready.
What to say when they push back
"I don't need therapy."
Try: "It is not just for people going through a crisis. Lots of people use it the way you'd use a doctor for your physical health. It is just a check-in to make sure you are doing well."
"That's for people with serious problems."
Try: "Actually, most people who use it are just going through big life changes, things like retirement, loss, health stuff. It is not about having a serious problem. It is about having someone to talk to who really listens."
"I can't afford it."
Try: "Medicare covers it. For most people it is completely free. You would not pay anything out of pocket." If they are on Medicare Advantage, confirm coverage first, but the answer is almost always the same.
How Total Life makes it easier for older adults
One reason older adults agree to try Total Life when they have said no to therapy before is the format. Sessions happen by phone, which means no computer, no video, no app, and no transportation required. Your parent can sit in their favorite chair and talk to a licensed therapist the same way they would call a friend.
Every therapist on the Total Life platform specializes in working with adults 65 and older. They understand the specific experiences that shape later life: loss, retirement, health changes, family dynamics, and isolation. There is no generalist learning curve.
You can get the process started on your parent's behalf. Learn more about therapy for seniors at Total Life, or visit our resources for aging parents.
Meet Our Providers
Licensed therapists who specialize in older adults.
Jill Foley Torres
Licensed Therapist
Kind, gentle, authentic, and collaborative, Jill uses cognitive behavioral therapy and other evidence-based approaches to support older adults through life's emotional challenges.
Read full bio
Stella Kerl-McClain
Licensed Psychologist
29 years of experience licensed in Oregon. Stella brings deep clinical wisdom and a steady, experienced hand to the mental health of older adults.
Read full bioFrequently asked questions
Questions from families helping a parent get started with therapy.
How do I convince my elderly parent to go to therapy?
Start with empathy and a specific observation rather than a general concern. Mention that Medicare covers it, so cost is not a barrier. Offer to handle the logistics for them. And give it time. A first no often becomes a maybe once the idea has settled.
Does Medicare cover therapy for my parent?
Yes. If your parent has Medicare Part B, outpatient therapy is covered at 80 percent after the annual deductible. With a Medigap supplement, the cost is typically $0. Most Medicare Advantage plans also cover therapy at $0 copay. Total Life confirms coverage before the first session.
What if my parent refuses therapy?
Give it time. Plant the seed, share information, and revisit the conversation after a few weeks. Many older adults come around once they understand that sessions happen by phone, that Medicare covers the cost, and that the therapist specializes in people their age.
Can my parent do therapy by phone?
Yes. Total Life offers phone sessions specifically because many older adults prefer not to use video or computers. No app, no login, no technology required. Your parent picks up the phone at the scheduled time and talks to their therapist. Medicare covers phone sessions for mental health.
Help your parent get started. Medicare covers it.
Therapists who specialize in older adults. Sessions by phone from home. Most patients pay $0.